Monday, October 10, 2011

The Crazies

I'm still not charting. And yet, I made the hasty decision last week on cycle day 3 that, hey, ya know what I haven't taken in a while???... CLOMID! And so, I called up one of my many NaPro Drs (boss #2) and asked if he'd prescribe it. He knows my history, knows I tend to stimulate well (as many PCOSers do) and wanted me to start with a low dose of 25mgs for 3 days.

I haven't taken anything since my 30th birthday cycle (Femara), and so I know I'll react well, but 25mgs seemed a little low to me... so since the pills came in 50mgs, I decided to just take the 50mgs for 3 days.

(Don't try this at home.)

I realize if I overstimulate, with such a small dose the risk really is only 2-3 follicles. I can handle that. I've had 3 follicles before (at least twice), and I do understand the risk of a multiple gestation. But really... what are the odds of someone who has never been able to catch ONE egg suddenly catching all 3?

I'll have a sonogram on Friday to see what size everything is and how many there are. I predict two.

I am SO excited about JellyBelly coming tonight! Granted, my house is an absolute disaster area, since my sister just moved to a smaller apartment and was trying to get rid of a lot of her furniture and stuff that won't fit in her new apartment. So, yes, there is an exercise bike in our kitchen and some medieval-type decorations in our sunroom. What? Like you don't have that same set-up? I did manage to clean the bathroom at the very least, so yay, me. At least I can give JB the illusion that I am a model homemaker and wife ;) (Oh, who am I kidding, she knows better!)

Not charting has been just about the best thing for me. I don't know why I was so hesitant to do it before. If I do notice anything funky, I can always jot it down retrospectively, since my cycles are so regular now (THANK YOU, OVARIAN WEDGE RESECTION!) But from what I've been able to see, I am still having TEBB, but it's not as bad as it used to be, and my mucus is somewhat limited (I don't take any mucus enhancers, though).

It'll be interesting to see this cycle's post-Peak hormones at P+7. I tend to get VERY high estradiol in the post-Peak when on Clomid. So high, in fact, that my first P+7 on Clomid had my Dr urging me to go get a bloodtest for pregnancy because she didn't believe my home pregnancy test was negative. I think my ovaries are just Choleric. They just need a little motivational spark and they go above and beyond expectations :)

Last Friday was an intensely emotional day for me and DH. It was his last court appearance, and the day of settlement. Unbenownst to DH, 3 firemen showed up to make their public statements (during which time they lied and said that the money taken out was meant to finish the fire hall... umm, that's funny, because DH single-handedly finished the fire hall years ago FOR COST with no profit!!) - it was the final humiliation.

I couldn't explain it at the time, but the entire day was extremely difficult for me. I would cry at the drop of a hat, and not a little tear here and there, I mean a full-blown crazy-cry. I think it was just the fact that for the past two years, this stress has been building and building and our lives have been on hold... it was as if we were holding our breath for two years, and now we were able to breathe again... but both of us were so hesitant to let that breath finally go. Very much a "waiting for the other shoe to drop" kind of situation.

But the good news is that the probation period (two years, starting now) will be held out in our current County where we live, AND DH checked to see if he could use any of his Knights of Columbus hours to satisfy the community service hours - he can!! We were very happy to hear this, because we assumed they wouldn't allow him to use that.

Today, a letter should be going from the court/probation office to DH's job, and PLEASE PRAY that this week, he will finally get the word that he can begin his job.

In the meantime, while we've been scraping the bottom of the barrel, it turns out God knew what He was doing. Our loan modification is going well, and in fact, our underwriter called me the other day to tell me that we had to prove a little bit MORE income in order to get the bank to agree to the modification. This won't be a problem, since DH is doing odd jobs for our neighbor at $15/hr. We had been using this cash for groceries and gas, but now we will deposit it first, to prove income. I had to laugh when I got off the phone with her: Imagine... we were TOO poor to get a loan modification! Haha, we OVERqualify for government aid ;)

Had DH started his job back on August 15th as originally planned, we may not have qualified at all for the modification. Which reminds me yet again... why do I ever doubt God??

Aside from the Clomid, not much else going on in the infertility scope. I'm still in a pretty good place, hopeful, but peaceful.

We may technically be able to look into foster care again now that settlement has happened. But my heart is telling me to wait. Things are so busy lately at the NaPro offices, and I know my presence is so important to the NaPro mission right now. Maybe in the New Year we'll re-evaluate our thoughts on foster care.

OK, I am off! Wish my follicles luck! ;)


the misfit said...

That's funny - I think my ovaries are melancholic. Absorb negative stimuli and brood on them for ages; typically sluggish; increasingly difficult to light a fire under. Perhaps this means they are also contemplative.

Hope your stimulation is going well! And so glad you guys have the court appearance under your belt. I can't believe that after all that the firefighters showed up and lied. What kind of people are these guys?

Simone said...

It sounds like you will be able to finally move forward. Although 2 years sounds like a long time, it will go by fast. I hope that this is one of many puzzle pieces getting put into place.

Hebrews 11:1 said...

Those people will have to answer eventually for what they did! That is terrible. I don't understand why they felt they had to go after him like that. How petty of them. Glad that's over. Good riddance I say!!

Take good care of Jellybelly before you send her off to me! :) I hope you have a great visit. I'm so jealous that she gets to see your house! Maybe I can come out for next year's world series which the Yankees are sure to be a part of? :)

Patiently Waiting...... said...

Hopeful, but peaceful. Such a wonderful combination of emotions. I hope the clomid works well this month.

Women for All Seasons said...

It's good to hear that he'll be able to stay in your current county and that the K of C time can count. Glad that you're hopeful too! You can do it, follicles!

JellyBelly said...

I am offering up all of my anxiety for the two of you while I'm with you!!!

Since you get to see all of my lady insides, does that mean I get to see yours too? (I'm just kidding, well maybe I'm being just a bit serious!).

Can't wait for our BW week to start!

Thankful said...

Let's go follicles! Despite the awful firefighters, it must feel good to have the court date done with and I will pray that he can start his new job soon. Enjoy your time with JB - you girls are both in my prayers.

Anonymous said...

So happy the settlement is over and done with and you both can move on! Interested to hear more about fostering...if and when you decide that's a direction you want to take :).

Jeanne G. said...

Oh! I didn't know you could be TOO poor for a loan modification. Maybe that is why we got rejected for ours! We got the letter on Saturday after I had surgery on Thursday on my hand, and the letter didn't explain why we were ineligible. I had a crazy cry then. I feel your pain. Well, some of your pain. Prayers for you!

Lowly But Chosen said...

Hi TCIE! Thinking about you and praying for you! We are so inspired by your witness and your faith. :) Do you have an email address where I can reach you?

Amy @ This Cross I Embrace said...

You can reach me at thiscrossiembrace at gmail dot com :)