I've been thinking about these words a lot lately. A lot. And trying to figure out a way to articulate WHY it is that I don't agree with how most people define them. "God's perfect timing," to me, does not mean that your prayers are answered when God feels the timing is perfect.
To me, as has been evidenced in my life, "God's perfect timing," has rather been about the timing of each cross we carry. For those who suffer the cross of childlessness, God knows already when and how (and if) we will be delivered from that cross. For Jane and Mike, it may be 3 years. For Sally and Tom, it may be 8 years. For Cassie and Frank, it may be never. And for Rachel and Chris, it may be 4 months. God is not waiting up in Heaven for us to discover the magic combination of prayers, understanding, and clarity in our cross before granting us the blessing of children. Nor is He waiting until we are at the exact right time of our lives (i.e, "No, they should not get pregnant this year, because they will buy a house this year and it will be too much stress for them. I will wait until NEXT year to give them a child, because then THAT will be perfect timing!")
Call me cynical, but I really don't think God works like that. I know many (who have received their blessings) will disagree.
Instead, I think God already knows in advance what the exact outcome of our cross will be - and the time we have been allotted by God to make something fruitful and beautiful out of our cross is REALLY what His perfect timing is all about.
None of us know when our time will be "up." We can be delivered of our cross at any moment. But we also may be asked to carry it for a lifetime. No matter what the end result, our focus should not be about that future moment which may or may not exist, but on how to use the moments right in front of us, here and now. Despair, complaining, whining, becoming bitter, and anger are not the ways to utilize God's perfect timing.
For those who still carry the cross of childlessness, this post is for you. I feel your pain, particularly lately, as we watch, read, and follow our friends who have been given their blessings. Try to look at it as YOUR blessing - that you have been given more time... more time to grow in love with God, to finally reach a place where you truly understand that the MIRACLE of life is not outside of you, in a child God entrusts to your care. It is, instead, the miracle of your heart being opened to God's will and knowing that Christ loves you SO MUCH He is giving you this time to discover things you may have never discovered without this time.
I am so thankful for the miracle that has come from my childlessness, and I pray the miracles continue to pour forth for me and for all of you!
Allow yourself to feel the pain, allow yourself to listen to God in that pain - He will guide you wherever He wants you to be now.
Because... His perfect timing for discovering His love is ALWAYS NOW.