"Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another."
If you're new to reading this blog, you may think what I'm about to tell you isn't true, can't be true. But those of you who have had the, um, pleasure(?) of reading for a while know that I couldn't possibly make this shit up.
My DH came in from watering the plants last night and looked a wreck. He had been on the phone, and asked if I could talk to him. He had just talked his sister out of having an abortion.
That's right. My sister-in-law is pregnant.
Immediately I knew which sister he meant (he has two). As some of you may remember, there was this whole fiasco a couple years ago. I knew if it were that sister, she wouldn't be considering abortion, but rather celebrating her "planned mistake" by starting to make arrangements for a baby shower and everything else.
No. This time, it is the 41 year old, divorced, living-with-her-boyfriend of 15 years her junior and supporting him as he goes back to school.
And to make matters worse, they have been fighting horribly lately, and when he found out about the pregnancy, he apparently yelled all kinds of mean things at her and said he'd pay for the abortion because he knew she'd come after him for child support.
Oh, and let me not forget to add that they apparently made a decision a while ago to stop using "protection," because if it happened, it happened, and they would "deal with it."
Selfish. Selfish. Selfish. All the way around. I can't think of any better word to describe this situation.
DH was able to talk her out of abortion, but honestly, I don't think she was really at risk. I know if she was truly considering abortion, her brother who is now devoutly Catholic and pro-life, who has also been battling infertility and praying for a baby for 5 years, would probably be the last person on earth she would call to discuss her plans. I think she called him because she knew in her heart what the right decision was going to be, and needed to hear from someone who agreed with her and would tell her everything would be ok.
But will it?
Yes, we've offered her all kinds of resources for free health and prenatal care (did I mention she does not have a steady income and has no health insurance??), as well as telling her that in the worst case scenario of my in-laws losing their house to foreclosure (a likely possibility), she could live with us with the baby. I am 100% on board with helping her out in any way I can.
But I'm also becoming quite annoyed by the whole thing. I mean, give me a break, this pregnancy for all intents and purposes was PLANNED! And now with no father figure even in the picture, and a quite possibly homeless mother whose business is going bankrupt... why is it that my DH and I are the ones holding her hand through this?? SHE'S 41 YEARS OLD!!!! Get a clue!!! Take responsibility for yourself!!
I realize that at her age this pregnancy truly is a miracle, though to her right now it must be very scary. And I also understand that at her age, she knows this is likely her last pregnancy and only chance to be a mother. But I am praying, and I hope you will join me, that she will at the very least CONSIDER an adoption plan, so that this baby might have a better life than what it seems like it will have now.
This is not my cross to bear, it is hers. But it certainly does add a bit to my burden, too. After we talked for several hours last night, I looked at DH, shook my head, and said to him, "What next? Your 66 year old mother with her tubes tied will get pregnant?" At this point, I really don't think I'd be surprised.