It astounds me how cruel people can be.
I will not be linking to anyone's blog in this post, because I don't think that it is proper blog etiquette to direct my readers somewhere where a) they may get upset themselves, and b) the blogger whose post I direct to may receive comments that attack them, their beliefs, their loved ones, etc. No matter which side of the "debate" someone is on, I find it very immature to go to someone else's blog and insult them.
But additionally, I find it just plain mean-spirited to write an entire blog post about someone whom you've never met, calling the blogger all sorts of names, and rallying all of your readers against her.
And today, that is what I have witnessed. And today, that is what makes me sad.
The worst part of the whole thing (and I know that the woman who is being so attacked right now would agree with me) is not the hurt surrounding the personal affronts, but rather the confusion, misconceptions, and downright bashing that is taking place around our Catholic faith. Why it is that Catholicism takes a beating more than any other religion in this country is beyond me... and why it is allowed (or ignored?) is another thing I can't understand.
I would like to address one very important point about the recent "debates" (putting it mildly) circulating this particular situation. That is, the point that most people bring to light when they disagree with the Church's teachings on IVF: If God did not approve, then He wouldn't make IVF "work."
Let's break this down a little bit. So, basically the logic here is that if some sort of procedure, or action, WORKS (produces its desired end result), then God automatically must have had His hand in it, and approves of its use.
Can this same argument be used, then, for anything? (If not, why not?) If so, then we can say that God approves of, oh, just about anything... if it works. God must have wanted me to have bigger boobs if He allowed my boob job to "work," and He must have wanted me to be a man if He allowed my sex change operation to "work."
But I've seen this negation turned on its head by those who support IVF. No, it's not just that God approves of anything that "works," but of COURSE He would approve of something that ultimately brings life into the world! Right?
OK. Sometimes incest and rape brings life into the world. Does God, logically, agree with the ACTION or PROCEDURE that lead to that life being brought into the world??? Why not?
** (Important to note is that NO MATTER HOW a child is conceived, via rape, incest, IVF, marital embrace, etc. they are LOVED by God and are NO LESS of a human person. This is another common misconception of Catholic teaching.)
But let's take it a step further. What do you say to women who have failed IVF 1, 2, 6, 9 times?? If they have never implanted, or never brought a baby to term? If the logical "defense" of God's approval of IVF lies in the fact that He ultimately decides whether or not it "works," then does He just have it out for the women for whom it never and will never work? Is He somehow saying that He wants Mrs. Y to have children through IVF (because it worked for her) but NOT Mrs. X?
To fully understand the Catholic position on IVF may be (and most likely is) beyond the scope of most people's ability, unless they truly WANT to understand it. I just hope that in the future, people can respect the fact that there are women and couples out there (out here!) who do hold these beliefs, who will defend these beliefs when attacked, and who will try to inform and educate those who do not understand these beliefs. This does not translate to judgement. I will wholeheartedly be the first to say I completely and utterly sympathize with the woman who is told she needs IVF, is considering IVF, is currently going through IVF, or has gone through IVF. Because, if a woman is enduring this emotionally and physically (and financially) draining procedure, it must mean she is also enduring something even more draining: infertility. And if nothing else, I can connect and relate to women carrying that cross. Take a stroll through my "TTC History" and you'll see I've done things most REs haven't even heard of ;) Emotionally, physically, and financially draining treatments. I've been there. I'm still there. 4 years and 2 months later. I know and feel your pain.
But now I feel the pain of staying up past my bedtime... uggggghhh...
'til next time.