Tuesday, January 27, 2009

**Possible New Development**

Last night DH had to drive me to and from CCD since our other car was in the shop. While I was waiting for him to come pick me up, I decided to go spend some time in front of the Eucharist (my parish doesn't have an official day/time for Eucharistic Adoration, but the church's side door is just always open). I prayed much like my Grandmother did before she got engaged to my Grandfather- - I asked God to help me decide what I should do. Keep TTC? Start adoption? Both? Neither? I needed something concrete to go on, and more importantly, I needed him to speak to DH, as well, since he has not been ready to look into adoption yet (maybe because it wasn't our time yet).

I only had about 5 minutes with Jesus, but I spent that time thanking Him for all of the gifts I so often take for granted.

I should back up and say that I went ahead and started some VERY PRELIMINARY research into domestic adoption on Friday. Not that we're ready to go that route yet, or even that we've ruled out international, but it just seems that the domestic adoption process may be a better fit for us at this point in time.

While researching (and pulling my hair out, I might add... how do you find the right "fit" when it comes to an agency??), I remembered seeing an adoption agency ad next to my ad for the Catholic IF Support Group in "The Catholic Spirit." I opened the paper to that page, found the webpage, and went to it.

At first, while reading the list of resources and services they provided, I navigated away from the page. I had read "embryo adoption," and decided since I don't personally agree with that, then I couldn't in good conscience work with a group that supported it.

Later that day, I went back to the site. I read their mission statement. It was all about wanting to find homes for babies that would otherwise be aborted. It was focused on seeking out the very best Christian homes for these babies. It's priority was to discover adoptive families whose Christian faith was part of their daily lives, not just a once-a-week church attendance.

So I figured, why not? Just sending away for material doesn't mean I HAVE to work with them.

Then today, their letter came. Their BEAUTIFUL letter. With a pre-application. I asked DH to read it, telling him about the "signs" - (the fact that their ad was right next to mine in the paper, and that I had asked God the night before for a sign about what to do). After reading the letter, DH said, "If we were going to adopt from any agency, I would want it to be an agency like this one." He also added that he had never really been interested in adoption until after reading that letter. God spoke to his heart!

We spoke a little longer (I'll spare you the boring details), and we've decided that God may just intend for us to start this journey now. We will keep TTC with meds until August or so (when the majority of Dr Toth's patients would have conceived, which is 9 months after treatment)- but in the meantime, we can get started with this. We realize that it could feasibly be a 3-4 year wait for a Caucasian infant.(We haven't ruled out bi-racial or African-American infant, either, but we would need to pray for guidance on that one since we want to put the child's needs first. It could be very difficult for a black child to have white parents, when other black children he sees have black parent/s. I know that it can and has been done, but like I said, we would want to take the utmost care and responsibility with a decision like that, and not be whimsical about it.)

Anyway, the conclusion of our talk is that I will be sending out the pre-application this week! I am soooo nervous and excited! Please pray for us!


Hafsa said...

Oh that is wonderful news. Isn't Adoration wonderful? Loooove it, and I've only done it once.

I hope this is the calming that you and your body needs. I'm praying for you guys!

Kathryn said...

I wanted to let you know that I am praying for you. My husband and I have two children - sweet little black americans! (we are both white). Our oldest was born in Ethiopia and our baby was born here in the states. I, too, have had concerns about my ability to give them all they deserve. It is certaintly something to pray about. Ultimately if you are called to adopt, God has the specific child in mind for you, and He will lead you there. :) God Bless you!

Beth said...

Awesome!!!! Ken and I really want to adopt someday too. We were in the process before M and it is still totally in our hearts! It is such a blessing for everyone involved.

Fight The Good Fight of Faith said...

That is awesome!! How God answers us eh? Sometimes i pray for signs and then totally miss them because i'm so set on my own plans still. I'm going to start praying to God about helping him open my DH's heart and mine! I want to adopt but it's so scary to me even though i know that's what I would love to do.
Praying for you!!

Jodi said...

Wow...that is amazing Amy! Saying prayers that this works out for you, but I'm glad you're not giving up with medicated TTC. I know that whatever God's intentions are for the two of you, you will make great parents either way.

E said...

Yeah for soft and open hearts! We will be on the waiting list for 2 years this May for our local Catholic Charities for a domestic infant but our projected wait time is 5 years. Let me know the agency so I can send for more information, too! Can't wait to talk to you guys next month. :)

prayerfuljourney said...

You are in my prayers. It took my husband and I a year of prayer before we were ready to start the adoption process. We went domestic. I just recommend that you do lots of research and talking to different agencies. We went with Catholic Charities and they have had only one infant adoption in the last two years. They concentrate more on foster care. I look back and wish we had done more investigating. We may have to change agencies or just opt to do foster care. I hope it goes well for you. God Bless.

Sew said...

That is great news! Very awesome!

I am praying for you!!!

Meg @ True, Good and Beautiful said...

That's awesome! I just sent out some information from a Catholic Adoption agency near us after seeing an ad in our Diocesan newspaper. I felt like it might be a sign, if at the very least to learn more!

Will be praying for you!

Jeremiah 29:11 said...

So exciting to have a new development. Keep up us posted!

Christina @ Faith for Fertility said...

What a wonderful new development! I started tearing up reading your post! My DH isn't interested in adoption at all at this point. I hope that when/if it comes to that point for us God will speak to his heart like he did your DH. I've also read about embryo adoption and think it's a great option for saving those babies. Praise God you found them! I'm praying all goes smoothly for you!

LifeHopes said...

What a wonderful revelation!!! I think adoption is -with or without infertility- one of the highest callings a married couple can have, and it sounds like you might be headed that way!

I will be praying for Him to continue to lead you specifically in the building of your family.

Anonymous said...

what a wonderful way to begin the journey of adoption. you, your husband and your future family are in my prayers.

to help with your choice of having an interracial family i thought you might be interested in this book: does anybody else look like me? a parents guide to multiracial children by donna jackson nakazawa.

KC said...

That is great news! Even if it is just preliminary. God will lead you down the right path!

Can't wait to hear more!

JellyBelly said...

what great news!

adoption is definitely an option for us. if we don't get pregnant in the next year we will definitely get that ball rolling. i know that in my heart that i'm not ready yet.

i definitely think that it was a sign that your ad was beside theirs! you're in my prayers.

Teresa & Connie said...

That is amazing news! I'm thrilled for you guys. My dad adopted me so to me adoption means everything. I'll be praying for you and your husband.

Kathryn said...

Thanks for the comment on my blog! If you ever have any questions, let me know! That goes for anyone. I can tell you all about international Ethiopian, or domestic adoption. Our international adoption took 10 months, and our domestic took 4 months.
I really have a heart for it. We can't wait to adopt again, but for now we are using Creighton in an attempt to concieve :) We have hope for a big family :)